Can I just say that Fifty Shades of Grey is not hot? Seriously. The “sexy” talk during the intimate scenes completely derails them, not to mention the fact that there are SO MANY that she just rehashes the same wording from the last eighty. Also, there is no plot. Huffing around about your boyfriend’s exes and whining because his abuse scars make it emotionally devastating for you to touch him does not a plot make.
The number of red flags BOTH of these ridiculous characters are constantly flying astound me. Ana KNOWS that Christian finds touching to be triggering, but instead of respecting the poor guy’s needs, she whines and touches him when he can’t stop her. Also, she is so childish and jealous that she freaks the fuck out any time anything reminds her that he has a past. Big deal! You’re, what? 22? If you were a little older or a little less of a prude (yeah, I said it), you might have a past, too! News flash: you are making yours now.
Don’t get me started on Christian’s red flags. Controlling stalker much? And don’t give me “but he has Strange and Dark proclivities” to try to make it okay. I don’t give a flying fuck whether your an adult baby furry who likes to yif your grandmother. It’s still not okay to be a controlling stalker. And NO, that is not just him being a Dom. I’d hate for this shitty fanfic to make any ‘nillas out there think that.
Ana needs to stop freaking out about kink. She hasn’t even tried anything crazy yet. Besides, it doesn’t matter what you or anyone else does in the bedroom, as long as it’s between consenting adults. Get over it. Besides. She has a raging foot fetish. You’d think she’d get over the rest.